Idk pt. five billion
I constantly have to tell myself not to worry so much. What’s happened in the past has passed. What’s happening in the present can be controlled. As for the future? Anything can happen and that’s the beautiful, beautiful, beautiful thing about it. That the past and present may not have had any consequence or that they had changed it for the better. Ambiguity at it’s finest! Or perhaps i’m using the wrong word.
Today I felt as if I were in purgatory. Caught in a sullen limbo of constant numbness, neither good nor bad making much of an impression on me. Lost, but wandering. It felt so strange. Feels so strange.
I don’t like it.
Because I really like to care about where i’m going and who i’m going there with. If I don’t work for the present than what do I have? Unchangeable past events and an unforseeable, untouchable future. But right now. Right now I can do something. Right now, I have the power to not quite touch, but guide my future to where i’d like it to go.
Isn’t that all the power we really have anyway? To dictate ourselves and our manner in a way that reflects the direction we’d like our lives to take?
I believe in fate, yes, but to a degree.
Above all else, I believe in myself.
I just have to stop forgetting that.
